The Answer to Hatred

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The attitude and expression of HATRED is as vile and destructive as anything humanity can express. Envy, fear, jealousy and anger fade away in comparison.

Ali is a devout Muslim and a good friend of mine. He told me that Mohamed, the founder of the Muslim faith, said that “hatred blackens the heart.”

The Bible has numerous references regarding the negative aspects of hatred. First John 3:15 puts it succinctly; “Everyone who hates another is a murderer.”

Hate is a breeder. It breeds strife, conflicts, crime and certainly murder. In recent years society has been informed about another result of hatred – ABUSE. Both physical and emotional. It’s usually powerful men that have such hatred as to beat women and children.

Hatred is also too often evidenced in families. Remember the Biblical story of Cain and Abel? Cain murdered his brother Abel.

Hatred is also the stimulant for two or more families feuding. The classic story is the Hatfield’s and the McCoy’s of the Appalachian Mountains. Their feud went on for generations. Hatred was a primary cause.

The most prevalent emotion that fans the flame of hatred is jealousy. The story of King Saul and David is a good example. His jealousy turned to hatred because the people praised David more than Saul.

A cursory study of the recent murders in Aurora, Colorado, Charleston, South Carolina and Roseburg, Oregon reveals a pattern of hatred. The three murderers had all or several things in common. All suffered from an “inferiorly complex,” many failures, socially inept, reclusive, no sense of purpose and above all, full of hatred.

In thinking of the three perpetrators, the concept of Alfred Adler’s (he was a contemporary of Sigmund Freud and Victor Frankl) “inferiority complex” describes them.

They usually are persons that have experienced multiple failures in his endeavors: social relationships, organizational activities (school, military, and group acceptance) or achievements.

There is a corresponding hatred toward others with images of “getting even” for causing their failures.

Adler also described the short stature and slim appearance as a Napoleonic Complex. They were all relatively short and belligerent. Because of their stature they were belligerent and hated everyone. Hatred is a creeping subtle condition. Increasing in intensity with every failure and feeling sorry for himself or herself.

Very much like a volcano that has boiling lava that unexpectedly explodes. With murderous or abusive action.

Is there help and if there is, what is it? There is. The most positive answer for hatred is an overwhelming love; followed with compensatory behaviors.

Where and when does the inferiority complex begin? As with racial prejudice, it is taught from birth. Both verbally and physically by parents and significant others. Verbal support with compliments and physical encouragement are essential. Acceptance of the child is vitally important.

There is nothing stronger than positive nurturing. The lives of the hatred driven perpetrators are example of such neglect.

Consider George Elliot’s classic story of “Silas Marner.” He was a weaver by trade. Silas is falsely accused of stealing from a congregation.

Obviously he is hurt and angry. He was declared guilty. His fiancée refuses to marry him and she marries the real culprit. He became angry and a broken man.

He becomes a recluse, avoids people, and is filled with hatred.

One night a violent snow storm hits the area and a young mother (Molly) collapses in the snow and dies. Her 2 year old daughter wanders into Silas’ home and he traces the path to Molly.

The story takes place in the early 1800’s and there was not a social service to care for such situations. Silas took her in and called her Eppie. For the love of the child he stopped being a miser, improved his habits, took her to church and school-all out of love.

At age 16, her biological father claimed her as his child but she chooses to live with Silas.

It is a story of love and hope in place of hatred and bitterness.

Genuine love and accompanying action are always the answer for hatred and an inferiority complex. Amen.

Selah. So be it.

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